Beautiful Things

All this pain. I wonder if I'll ever find my way. I wonder if my life could really change at all. All this earth. Could all that is lost ever be found? Could a garden come up from this ground at all?

You make beautiful things, You make beautiful things out of the dust. You make beautiful things, You make beautiful things out of us.

All around, hope is springing up from this old ground. Out of chaos, life is being found in You.

You make me new, You are making me new.

Gungor, Beautiful Things

I took this picture in Austria on one of my toughest days. It was raining and my stomach had never felt worse. There we were, trudging through the wet earth, and then I saw these flowers. I continually noticed flowers like this in Austria-these flowers that grew out of the rocks. Flowers are such delicate wonders, so it is amazing to me that they can thrive in the rocks.

This quarter, we are studying the book of Genesis. I have been reading what has always felt like the same Sunday school story, but with a very critical eye. I have been noticing so many different aspects of the story deep beneath the surface of the simple words on the page. I studied Genesis two years ago when I came to SPU as a freshman, but it didn't have so much meaning to me then. Now, after two very life changing years and a summer spent in creation, the first book of the Bible and I have grown very close to one another. My biggest realization is that this faith is so simple, but it is also so complex.

Reading Genesis 1, I was so full of inexpressible joy at the concept that God created a beautiful and flawless world just for us. I reflected on my time in the mountains and how perfect creation is. And then we got to Genesis 2...also known as: The part where we screwed it all up.

I can't really wrap around my head the idea of a flawless world because it is not something I have ever known. I imagine it as the moments of beauty I experience every day, but that's all there is. A flawless world is a beautiful thing and when I read that Adam and Eve ate from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, I can't help but cry out in agony. Why? Why would they ruin something so perfect? I can't help but wonder if it broke God's heart the day that sin entered His perfect world.

This realization came at a perfect time for me. A week ago, I heard terrible news from a friend...a story of complete brokenness. She told me her story and I wept as I realized that so much of my life is based on trust and when that trust is broken, all I want to do is start over. That's when these song lyrics came into my life: YOU MAKE ME NEW. Out of brokenness, Christ brings healing. Out of darkness, Christ brings light. Out of dust, Christ brings life.

God intended for us to live lives of love and joy, not lives full of fear. The story of the tree in the garden should not be one full of heartache, but one full of redemption and grace. The Christian faith is based on a story of hope and hope is something I can give my whole heart to. God has made me stronger this week. He has given me the courage to hand over what weighs me down and that is how I am able to continue living a life full of joy in the midst of grief.