Some Things I Will Never Forget

There have been many moments this year that will never slip from my memory.  Beautiful and sometimes ridiculous moments with wonderful friends and lessons learned.    A lovely year, full of lovely times.  Let me share them with you:

1. Going to Fred Meyer at midnight my first night at school and breaking a bunch of vases.

2. Skipping orientation to watch Stranger than Fiction with Craig and Emily. 

3. Doing (unbeknownst to me) The Thizzle Dance with Liz in front of all the residents.

4. Driving to Deception Pass instead of Camp Casey.

5. Lying under the stars in a big field with Jessica and realizing the blessing that SPU was going to be for me.

6. Getting my face cut up by the blackberry bushes and calling myself Scarface the rest of the weekend.

7. Mattress Dominoes!

8. The day I wanted to be with an old friend and Allison Pringle miraculously appeared.

9. Listening outside my window to Brian Hibbard and half of Hill Hall worshiping in the main lounge on a random Tuesday night.

10. Teylar Greer.

11. Praying on the first day of class.

12. Floor dinners.

13. The last day of Fall Quarter when I bought Thai Food and sat and watched the wind blow outside my window.

14. The snowy Sunday at Bethany.

15. A white Christmas.

16. The fuzzy hats that Noah bought all of us for Christmas.

17. New Year's in Fresno.

18. Driving in the snow...it is not an easy thing to do.

19.  Snow on the first day back after Christmas.

20. Learning how to play the ukulele.

21. Playing music with Anna.

22. 4th Hill Christmas Morning, complete with Santa and cinnamon rolls.

23. group.

24. Inauguration day!

25. Teaching tap dancing to many girls on my floor and one boy from Ashton in the Hill Hall Lobby.

26. Tetris addicts turned into Oregon Trail fun.

27. Listening to all the different people playing piano in the lounge and, by the end of the year, knowing who they all were by their own style of playing.

28. Old-Fashioned Fridays.

29. Watching the snow fall on three different Thursday mornings with Teylar.

30. Teachings from Suzanne Wolfe:

• You are valuable to God simply because you exist.
• God works through us in a fallen world, it is grace through nature.
• True ugliness is ugliness of heart...the inability to love.
• Grace is frightening because it asks us to go from the place where we're comfortable to another place...it's meant to save us, but it instead terrifies us.
• If we give something, we give everything. If we give everything, we give nothing.
• Moments of pain and sin come with a purpose and GRACE
• Love means laying down your life.

31. A terrible class that led the way to a beautiful friendship (Jillian and I became friends during UFND).

32. Dahlstroms in Disneyland!

33. Applying for (and being rejected for) SMC.

34. The realization that my faith grew exponentially when I was entirely okay with not getting that position.

35. Deciding that theatre is no longer my life and changing my major to Global Development Studies.

36. Our band, Friends & Family.  Late night practices, the Q-Cafe show and savory crepes.

37. Hill Hall Ball...so many memories.  Fly Me to the Moon, Paper Planes and All the Single Ladies.

38. Ben and Anna...how exactly did that happen?

39. Late nights of talking with Aly.

40. Tucking in Krista and Ali Morgan.

41. Smallgroup picnic.

42. Quelf bringing me to tears.

43. Fourth Hill Talent Show.

44. Holly Pocket, Hollipop, and Mamma Holly.

45. Watching Life Size with the brothers.

46. Breakfast: Tator tots with Anthony, watermelon thieves and those Monday/Wednesday/Fridays with the lovely ladies of Fourth Hill.

47. Roomies with Chris Hanson.

48. Fourth Hill...the bro flo.  How I love them all... 

49. Seeing Hello Dolly with Paul.

50. My last night in the dorms: staying up until 4 in the morning with Megan and Anna.  Remembering what a year it has been and being so thankful.

It has been quite the year and I am constantly amazed by the blessing it has been for me.  I will never forget my Freshman year at SPU and I can only hope that next year will be just as wonderful!

One Fourth Finished

In the blink of an eye, my first year at SPU was over.  The room was arranged to its original state, I had turned in my fifteenth paper for Playscript Analysis and I had one last bowl of honey nut Cheerios for dinner in Gwinn.  Time had done something strange in the last week.  On Tuesday, I went to my high school's graduation and it felt like a decade ago that I walked onto the same platform to receive my diploma.  Then, on Friday, I dusted off the shelves, turned in my key and wondered where the year went.  The same time period was so slow, yet so fast at the same time.  I learned so much in a short nine months and I am in awe of the blessings that have been poured into my life over the past year.  Here is what I have learned:

1. In the great words of While You Were Sleeping, "Life doesn't always turn out the way you expect."

I often feel like I cam to SPU for all the wrong reasons.  It was in Seattle.  I got a tuition discount.  These aren't the right reasons for choosing a school, but it turned out better than I ever could have imagined.  I moved in on September 25th and by September 28th, I was already calling it home.  I was worried about entering a closed off Christian world, but that is not what SPU is.  It is a community that encourages its students to go out into the world and share Christ's love in whatever form suits them.  In art, music, science, English, and education.  It is not a community for Christians to hide, it is a community where Christians can grow.  

2. Nothing is required in college.

College is a place to make your own decisions, whether they are good or bad.  It is one step on the road to being "in the real world."  On the first day of orientation, I slept in and watched a movie instead of going to a workshop.  No, I'll never know what they taught that day, but I don't feel like I missed out on much.  I also skipped class one day to catch up, but that made me fall even farther behind.  It works both ways, but when you enter college, each decision is your own and so is each consequence.  The point is, what you get out of college is the same amount as what you put into it.

3. "Engaging the culture and changing the world" isn't such a bad idea.

My cynicism began before I even applied to SPU.  In my mind, I vowed that if I got another brochure that said "Engage the culture, change the world," I would not apply.  Unfortunately, it is on just about every envelope, letterhead and webpage, so there's no escaping it.  Eventually, you have to say, "If you can't beat them, JOIN THEM!"  So, I did.  I changed my major from Theatre Education to Global Development Studies.  I gave up on becoming an actress, lost the urge to become a teacher and instead decided I want to work in non-profits that make a difference all over the world.  In SPU's over-used words, they change the world.

4. More often than not, God has different plans for us.

What those plans are, though, is often very hard to figure out.  This year, I often felt "called" to one thing, but then God said, "no."  When I applied to be a Student Ministry Coordinator, I was told by many that I was a "shoe-in" for the position and I secretly felt the same way.  We were wrong and I had a sick feeling in my stomach that screamed "What now?"  My bible practically opened itself to show the words of Psalm 13: "How long, O Lord?  Will you forget me forever?  How long will you hide your face from me?..Look on me and answer, O Lord my God...But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation.  I will sing to the Lord, for he has been good to me."  I couldn't fight with words like that, so I searched for a new opportunity and, after yet another long application process, found on in the form of group staff.  I will now be spending Wednesday nights playing violin on the worship team.  It is a better fit than SMC and, like always, God was right.

5. Love is what binds us all together.

I have never seen as much love as I have in the last nine months.  And I've seen a lot of love in my life, so that's saying something.  The girls who lived on my floor this year were all so full of love for one another and for the world around them.  The relationships that have been formed are so strong and deep, even though they are so short.  The love that teachers show for their students is incredible and so unique for a college setting.  My dear friend Anna is constantly mentioning how we, as Christians, are called to love.   This is why we love: We love one another so that we may show God's love.  If nothing else, that is our purpose here on earth.  God is love and we are meant to share that love with one another.  Being at SPU, that love was made clear to me every day in the community I was living, learning and growing in.  Love is a beautiful thing and it is what brought us all so close to one another this year.

"No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us." -1 John 4:12

It was an excellent year and I still can't believe it's already over.  I've learned and grown so much this year, I can't imagine doing it all again.  But I will.  There's a whole summer to recuperate and then I can only hope that I'll do it all over again.  That I'll be able to learn and grow as much next year as I did this year.  As Tevye said in Fiddler on the Roof: "Then we will leave it (the future) in His hands."  And that is what I will do, I will leave my questions about the future in His hands and I will continue to live and learn and grow.